I read that I should make this 30 even though I have a 40k capacity (2.0 cubic ft) tank
The usual total softening capacity for Cation softening resin is typically 32,000 grains per cubic foot (ft3), so a total 40K grains softening capacity will signify 1.25 ft3 of resin, not 2 ft3 of resin (=64K total grains capacity).
As regeneration of all 32K Total Capacity in 1 ft3 resin will require 20 lbs salt, to regenerate all 40K capacity in 1.25 ft3 will then require 25 lbs salt each cycle. Regenerating the resin's total capacity each cycle, in addition to being impractical, would be highly wasteful and inefficient at only 1,600 grains per lb efficiency.
Increasing salt efficiency is achieved by programming less capacity to be depleted before regeneration is to occur while using the correct amount of salt needed to regenerate that amount of depleted capacity. Unfortunately, higher salt efficiency requires some compromise as the amount of hardness leakage will eventually increase through the resin bed, thereby resulting in somewhat lower quality soft water supplied to home fixtures and appliances.
By programming regeneration to occur when 30K grains capacity is depleted for 1.25 ft3 resin, only 10 lbs salt each cycle will be needed, thereby increasing the maximum potential salt efficiency to 3,000 grains per lb. These settings will provide the best balance of salt efficiency, water quality, and useable capacity.
As each gallon of water entering the brine tank will dissolve 3 lbs salt, to program the appropriate Brine Fill setting minutes, will require knowing which BLFC (brine line flow control) restrictor is installed. The BLFC flow rate is usually specified on a label located on the side of the control valve, close to the brine line connection.
BD (brine draw) - I had this set at 60, but I notice that most of the brine is drawn out of the tank pretty quickly. So the rest of the remaining time, the resin is being rinsed with water, correct? What is the purpose of this?
The 'Brine Draw' or 'Draw' setting, actually controls two cycles, Brine Draw and Slow Rinse.
The full amount of salt brine from within in the brine tank, should be typically transferred to the resin tank during the initial ~15-minutes of a 60-minute Brine Draw cycle (=~25% of the Brine Draw setting). The remaining ~45-minutes Slow Rinse, will slowly push the brine through the remaining resin bed, and will also rinse away the calcium & magnesium ions that are released from the resin, while also rinsing away excess sodium remaining from the salt brine.
When the Brine Draw setting is too short, then the softened water supplied to fixtures directly following each regeneration cycle, will typically taste quite salty.
For most residential sized softeners utilizing efficient settings, a 60-minute BD setting is usually appropriate.
RR (rapid rinse) - What are the disadvantages of just setting this to 0?
The Rapid Rinse cycle is not intended to rinse salt or calcium/magnesium from the resin bed, but it's purpose is to recompact the resin bed prior to restoring Service flow to fixtures.
During the Backwash cycle, the resin bed was lifted and expanded to not only eliminate any physical debris that entered from the water supply, but also to recirculate the resin within the tank (reclassify), and also expand the spaces between resin granules, thereby permitting the granules more complete contact with the brine during the BD cycle.
Recompacting the resin bed will reduce the spaces between granules, thereby reducing the amount of hardness leakage potential to initially pass through the resin bed.
Often the RR cycle is programmed for 10-minutes duration, but 5-6 minutes is often sufficient.
Since service flow to fixtures is downward through the resin bed, the resin will eventually become recompacted, so many softeners did not previously utilize a RR cycle. The RR setting is not critical, but I would suggest programming RR for 5 -minutes duration, which should reduce the potential for hardness leakage directly following each regen cycle when hardness leakage is otherwise most likely to occur.
I anticipate your resin tank's diameter is 10", so the Backwash and Rapid Rinse flow rate should be 2.4 GPM, as controlled by the DLFC (drain line flow control) restrictor that is installed, which should also be indicated on a label on the side of the control valve. The Slow Rinse and Brine Draw flow rate will be substantially lower as that is controlled by which injector is installed. The injector color should also be specified on a label in the side of the control valve.