I'd check my filters to see if they weren't clogged or torn inside. When your softener does a recharge, can you look at the water coming out to see if it's clear?
Depending on the water levels, sometimes, you may be pumping some silt up from your well.
Soft water and changing your anode before it decays to nothing can help a WH last longer. Some places like apartments and condos require them to be changed at about the typical warranty interval, just to help prevent damage to adjacent units. In a home, you have a bit more flexibility. A failure USUALLY starts out with a small leak, but not always. But, if it's not somewhere that you can see it, you may not notice until it became major. Often, but not always, you have a few days between observing a leak and a major failure, but again, you can't count on it. If the WH is where it will just be an inconvenience, and not damage things, you might just wait for it to leak. Otherwise, you might want to budget and plan to replace it. It could last another 12-years, it could fail tomorrow, and the new one may not last 12-years, either. It's somewhat the luck of the draw.