COVID-19 Funny Jokes

[Dj2]

- A man orders a large coffee to go, goes to the cashier, pulls a roll of TP, rips one square and hands it to the cashier.
Cashier: that will be two squares.

 

[Fitter30]

Butt was it two ply?

 

[Sponsor]

 

[WorthFlorida]

My wife came in and sat on my stomach today. I asked her why. She said she was flattening the curve ...

 

[FullySprinklered]

I've found that if you don't have food, you don't need toilet paper.

 

[How J]

By now we've all heard about Covid. It's gone viral.

 

[WorthFlorida]

A wife and husband went grocery shopping. Both put on their mask, stayed the distant at the supermarket, careful at the cashier station. When they arrived home and took off their mask, the wife then realized she brought home the wrong husband!

 

[Terry]

When I go shopping, I smile and nobody seems to even notice.
So then I do a real big smile and still get just nothing.
I guess they're too busy to notice.

 

[Amanda Stone]

By now we've all heard about Covid. It's gone viral.

haha, nice one

 

[Sylvan]

Little known fact

IF your parents did not have children neither would you

 

[Sylvan]

This is the joke I saw today

Not only was the T&P piped directly into the drainage system for good measure they also installed a 3/4 x 3/4 x 1/2 Tee for the back flow preventor to drain into all tied into the sanitary waste line

I think the stumble bum who did this installation was doing it T&M so they could charge more for the ells used

By the way the "home inspector" never said a word about this