Idiots and fire
Posted by Mad Plumber on July 26, 19100 at 21:51:37:

Dina,
That's a pretty good story. I read it a bunch of times to my wife and she was just rolling on the floor laughing. I was going to write a story, but I couldn't come up with any thing that sounded like an idiot woulda donit. I know I've done a lot of idiot things before too. I know you're thinking,
"No way! Mad Plumber, you don't look like the type that makes mistakes!"
Sorry to burst your bubble, but yes, I'm afraid that even the Mad Plumber has made a few of his own in addition to fixing other peoples mistakes.
All these mistakes help me to plumb better. I've started a few fires while soldering pipes in homes. Mainly small ones I can put out with a spray bottle. Well, one day my apprentice is soldering in a garage wall with insulation, and I say.
"Hey! pull that dang insulation away when you're soldering!"
I say that because I know about these things. And he yells back,
"Do you think I'm stupid?"
Well, I don't think he's stupid, but I am afraid he will solder without pulling the insulation away. I go back to what I'm doing, Now keep in mind, the water is off for the entire building. No way to put a fire out. Even stupid ol me doesn't have a way to put a fire out. Next thing I hear is,
"Dang! the wall's on FIRE! What do I do? The flames are going up inside the wall where I can't see them! Mad Plumber, what do I do?"
I yell back,
"Pull the dang insulation out of the wall you stupid moron!"
Next thing I hear is,
"Ow! Ow! this tar on the paper is sticking to my hands and burning me!"
"Aren't you wearing gloves?"
"No! I don't need them!"
I'm telling you, at this point I am MAD! I go around to the other side of the garage wall and see this stupid moron pulling drywall off the wall and piling up burning insulation on the floor with little flames on his hands while he's doing it.
After I calm down my apprentice says,
"Aren't you glad I didn't burn the house down?"
And I say back,
"Oh yeah! I think you're making this the happiest day of my life!"
Mad Plumber


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