Back in 2000, I was put on mega does of steriods to treat the anemia chemo caused, and I had gained... 90 some pounds! This put me into the fatty category. I wasn't happy about it. I never touched a chip. We did the blood transfusions, when we could find the blood. My blood type is in the 1% of the total population in the US. The steriods caused 2 eventual heart attacks. But, this is now, 2011 and still, thankfully, alive. This anemia almost cost me my life. It was the closest ever I was to death.
The scooters, ah yes, the scooters. My aunt used one because she had a heart attack and her heart was too weak to walk. Yes, she was a fatty. What would you had thought if you saw her? My husband was 6' feet and weighed 172 when he succumbed to a heart attack. Both of them, had genetic heart problems. One lived, one died. The one who died was because the medicine man failed to do his job. Would my husband had used a scooter if he had lived and needed to? I would had made sure he did. Would it had been different in what you thought if you would had seen him in a scooter?
Then, I was put on new and improved drugs and lost weight. I had people asking me, " do you have an eating disorder honey?" The waitress in a restaurant gave me the evil eye when I ordered something light to eat, so much so was the hairy eye-ball, I had to tell her the truth, I was on chemo and the round of ah's... spoke her ignorance. At the time, I now weighed 88 pounds, way too skinny, I was an Olive Oil straight out of the cartoons or maybe, a person who looked like a Holocaust survivior.
Oh my God, what is this world coming to, a kid eating a candy bar. I remember once many years ago, I was in the supermarket with a friend and we both had our kids with us. My younger son came up asking me if he could get a book. Being I was a member of the RIF, love reading, got an extensive library of my own and was impressed & happy as hell he asked because of his dyslexia the answer was, go for it, get a book.
My friend's little girl came up asking her mom the same question, being I knew of the woman's financial difficulties none of which she made herself, it is called, life, I wasn't surprised when she said to just get a candy bar.
OH MY GOD, I am sure what some other's thought around her. The kid asked for a book and was told to get a candy bar. What they didn't know and what facts wasn't available to them was she had a very sick mother and dad, taking care of both of them, physically and financially. Her and her husband was footing the bill, and using their own sweat in the process of being round the clock nurse's. It was a "splurge" for the little girl to get a candy bar and far less money than a book.
Monday nights we all would go to the book mobile and get "free" loans on books. She would sit and read with her kids.
I remember something growing up I had wished over a period of time I could had forgotten. I was a little girl sitting in church on Sunday and my mom was the best. My clothes was clean and very nice. But, maybe not nice enough for some folks, for the 2 old women dressed in better clothes, infact one was a fur, sitting next to me. I remember hearing that they said about me, it was "disgraceful" that I came to church in what they called and what you called, " rags."
These were not rags. It was a pretty little dress which I was proud of, which wasn't good enough for them. Maybe, they didn't learn a lesson that day, unless, God taught them something in that church that day that I didn't hear or see, but, I know I learned a lesson. The lesson was not to judge.
I remember looking at them so they know I even heard. I was convicted of what Ballsvalve? What is a kid convicted of for eating or wanting a candy bar?
In life, in all walks of life, I will meet others who are different than me, but none better than me, none less than me, just different and those differences are what makes us all unique and it is global.
When I see someone different than me, someone who needs help, I know they have a story to tell, a reason how and why it all happened. How they got to that point in their life, whether it be, they weigh 400 pounds, homeless, jobless, sick, anything else that life can throw at you. When we are lucky enough, strong enough, like some people tell me, that we can field those things and get well despite what doctors tell you; if you, can build a house on a rock and make it home, then, we need to help others be able to do the same. Some people are not as lucky as us, or as strong as us, and to share our strengths and abilities and our luck is the right thing to do. The only thing to do. I believe in the govn programs, and for those who need it, we need more of those, but we also, need people to open their hearts and minds and at times, their wallets to be their for others who need it to survive and to make a life easier to live.
If you want to help someone, then help someone, do not judge. Buy them something healthier and say, " here, enjoy," with a smile on your face. I have dropped off bags of groceries to families through the years and left the bag on the porch. In it, if they had kids, you would find healthy stuff and a junk candy bar. Help them, don't lecture them, or judge them, offer them even a job, if in the position to, and remember the golden rule, of treating others the way you would want to be treated. Above all, don't eye their candy up they might think you want it.